The Cute Girl's Guide on How to Meet and Date Asian Men
Hello again! Huggable Heather by incorporating dating advice for the cute girls out there who are crazy for Asian guys but have no idea how to meet much less talk to Asian men! I put my head together with JT Tran, the Asian Dating Coach, as well as solicited the advice from my fellow girls that exclusively love them some Asian men.
Date Asian Men
Now, JT Tran firmly believes that it's the Asian man’s duty and privilege to approach women confidently in order to kickstart the courtship ritual. However, he also recognizes that sometimes we ladies with the 21st century are tired of ready for our Asian Prince Charming to brush us off our feet and instead a cute girl has gotta do what cute girl has got to do and take matters into our own manicured hands.
And so i (and several other ladies who were persuaded to contribute) am here to provide a few tips and pointers who have worked for me in the past and how you can apply them inside your dating life!
First thing’s first - not every Asian guys are alike.
Just like how not all guys are alike, its not all Asian guy will likely be the same. As such, there's no end-all tactic how to meet and to date Asian men.
You wouldn’t like it if some guy said “all cute girls are the same”, so we’re not doing that here with Asian men - every individual guy who so happens to be Asian have “an infinite quantity of variables” (to quote JT) that create his unique personality. We must remember that they are human first and Asian guys second.
WARNING: I’m not giving advice that is 100% guaranteed on how to meet and date Asian men, just advice based upon my own experiences.
1. Be Obvious
Do you want you met your Asian man?
Isn't it time you met your Asian man?
There’s a stereotype that Asian men are shy and intimidated by women. While that just isn't necessarily true, there are a lot of shy guys on the market and, since you’re looking over this, you probably have an Asian guy in your mind. Since a more confident Asian guy would’ve already asked you out of trouble (or if you have a friend that could do with more confidence, point them to the ABCs of Attraction: The Confidence Course for Asian Men), let’s target the shy ones.
That said, it helps a shy guy out when you’re a bit more obvious about how much you prefer him.
I was raised in a conservative town, therefore i was more or less told that girls were supposed to hold out, twiddling your thumbs, for guys to question you out. Being the girl, you were to give them subtle hints concerning your feelings (what JT Tran calls Indicators of Interest). This could be anything from giving one a lingering look to lightly touching him about the arm when you talk should you liked him or just being cold and distant should you weren’t interested. These hints do work, but sometimes they’re not obvious enough to get a painfully shy person or someone not versed at dating.
My advice? If you can tell that your Asian guy is super shy, approach him - don’t await him to approach you.
I know, this is totally opposite from what JT says, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do in order to figure out how to date Asian men! Locate a common interest to speak about and make the subtle hints. If he doesn’t respond to one or two, give him other obvious cues, like asking if he desires to go for coffee or telling him that you will wanted to see a certain new movie.
You may even mention that you’ve dated Asian guys before. Try this without completely throwing your self on him. This way, he will understand that you are interested and never get totally freaked out because of your “forward” behavior.
2. Have patience
After working with JT Tran and his Confidence Training Course, I’ve learned several things about the male perspective on dating. I have to say - there is a LOT of pressure on guys which i never realized before! They have to muster the courage to ask a girl out, hope they don’t get rejected, determine a date, keep her entertained for some hours and hope things go on to another date plus a potential relationship.
In the event you don’t have a lot of experience regarding how to meet members of the opposite sex, to the point where you’re immune to rejection, it could be nerve-wracking. If you have been giving obvious, subtle hints without much response, don’t assume that he doesn’t like you - these things can take some time.
Before I learned the way to meet and date Asian men alone, I once had to drop hints for four months before one guy realized my feelings and inquired about out! I was definitely more patient than most ladies, but it can pay off over time.
One thing that I discovered that has worked for me is putting myself as part of his proximity over an extended period of time. Another guy I used to be interested in was a waiter with a Korean restaurant. I was attracted to him, but he was usually pretty quiet and kept to himself. I kept visiting the restaurant - maybe once per week or so - and that we gradually started starting to warm up to each other. Eventually, it have got to the point where he would pull up a chair next to me and talk to me as I ate.
Finally, he asked for my number! Success!
3. Remember
Okay, so you’ve given him every one of the hints in the world and he’s finally asked you out. Your date with him, however, wasn’t everything you were expecting - he’s not making the moves you want him to, even though you’re still being ridiculously obvious. What now?
Sometimes, a man is getting the signals and also understands that they are cues for him to behave - anything - but has zero idea what to do with a lovely girl. If you are in this situation, don’t get discouraged. You need to simply realize that he may not fully comprehend what is happening, especially if he isn’t utilized to dating outside his race or culture, a lot less a cute girl.
This isn’t all guys, of course, but there are the occasional few that don’t believe what’s happening: which you, a gorgeous woman, are out on a date with him. There are others that doubt your hints - they don’t believe that a cute girl could possibly be giving them cues and don't recognize the correct response.
From my experience, it’s best to be blunt but perceptive. Some guys take some more reassurance than the others, but that doesn’t imply that they aren’t giving you any resposes in any way.
I was on a date once in which the conversation was so frustratingly awkward that I couldn’t wait for it to finish. I was totally sure that he felt much the same way, but I kept the conversation going each time it trailed off. As we left the restaurant, however, he picked me up off the ground and twirled me around his car, exclaiming how happy he was to be out with me and how much he liked talking to me!
I remarked that he was interested in me, and he later confessed he was nervous about creating eye contact for so long. He actually really enjoyed our date, something which really surprised me!
In the long run, I just needed to be conscious of his feelings rather than project mine to the entire date.
4. Be Sensitive
Remember earlier after i said that not all Asian guys are alike? I really do mean it.
Its not all Asian guy is going to be enthralled with KPop (people are not from my experience) or watch hours of anime at a stretch (slightly more common than KPop lovers, but nonetheless not a majority from our experience) just because those activities are Asian. Therefore, it isn’t in your best interest to come off as a rabid fangirl to him, cooing over pictures of Rain or fawning over Ichigo from Bleach.
Although some guys may that way sort of thing (try your neighborhood anime-con if you’re into that), that’s not first thing you want to talk about with every Asian person you meet, aside from an Asian guy you’re attracted to. Quite frankly, if a woman produces those kinds of signals, you’re planning to scare him off to someone who just uses Asian men.
In the event that sounds strange to you personally, let me put it in perspective: could you walk up to a Black guy and talk about how funny Chris Rock and Dave Chapelle are after a fist bump? Can you then proceed to talk about how horrible slavery was and then apologize for you ancestors?
While it’s this is not on the same level, you don’t want your first sentence to a Asian guy to become about something so stereotypically Asian. It may remind them that you see is “just an Asian” before you decide to and not, in fact, anyone that they are, since their personality is not contained merely inside their race. Depending on who they may be, it may be a turn-off.
With this one, just keep it simple. Talk about your weird English professor, ask his opinion on the best place to get pizza around town, or find out what he is doing in his free time. You can mention that you’ve dated Asian guys before (as covered in obvious hints), but save that tidbit for some minutes in.
I’ve personally found out that if you talk about a guy’s “Asianness” too quickly, the conversation will go south very quickly. I'm able to empathize - who likes feeling objectified? In the end, just make sure that you’re both fairly confident with each other before mentioning potentially touchy subjects.
There isn't any big secret on dating Asian guys. Everyone is going to be different - just like guys in general.
Date Asian Men
I will be confident, however, in my opinion and am certain that this could work for you. If you have any information on what has worked for (or on) you, I might love to hear it, so please will bark in the comments section! Many thanks for reading!
Date Asian Men
Now, JT Tran firmly believes that it's the Asian man’s duty and privilege to approach women confidently in order to kickstart the courtship ritual. However, he also recognizes that sometimes we ladies with the 21st century are tired of ready for our Asian Prince Charming to brush us off our feet and instead a cute girl has gotta do what cute girl has got to do and take matters into our own manicured hands.
And so i (and several other ladies who were persuaded to contribute) am here to provide a few tips and pointers who have worked for me in the past and how you can apply them inside your dating life!
First thing’s first - not every Asian guys are alike.
Just like how not all guys are alike, its not all Asian guy will likely be the same. As such, there's no end-all tactic how to meet and to date Asian men.
You wouldn’t like it if some guy said “all cute girls are the same”, so we’re not doing that here with Asian men - every individual guy who so happens to be Asian have “an infinite quantity of variables” (to quote JT) that create his unique personality. We must remember that they are human first and Asian guys second.
WARNING: I’m not giving advice that is 100% guaranteed on how to meet and date Asian men, just advice based upon my own experiences.
1. Be Obvious
Do you want you met your Asian man?
Isn't it time you met your Asian man?
There’s a stereotype that Asian men are shy and intimidated by women. While that just isn't necessarily true, there are a lot of shy guys on the market and, since you’re looking over this, you probably have an Asian guy in your mind. Since a more confident Asian guy would’ve already asked you out of trouble (or if you have a friend that could do with more confidence, point them to the ABCs of Attraction: The Confidence Course for Asian Men), let’s target the shy ones.
That said, it helps a shy guy out when you’re a bit more obvious about how much you prefer him.
I was raised in a conservative town, therefore i was more or less told that girls were supposed to hold out, twiddling your thumbs, for guys to question you out. Being the girl, you were to give them subtle hints concerning your feelings (what JT Tran calls Indicators of Interest). This could be anything from giving one a lingering look to lightly touching him about the arm when you talk should you liked him or just being cold and distant should you weren’t interested. These hints do work, but sometimes they’re not obvious enough to get a painfully shy person or someone not versed at dating.
My advice? If you can tell that your Asian guy is super shy, approach him - don’t await him to approach you.
I know, this is totally opposite from what JT says, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do in order to figure out how to date Asian men! Locate a common interest to speak about and make the subtle hints. If he doesn’t respond to one or two, give him other obvious cues, like asking if he desires to go for coffee or telling him that you will wanted to see a certain new movie.
You may even mention that you’ve dated Asian guys before. Try this without completely throwing your self on him. This way, he will understand that you are interested and never get totally freaked out because of your “forward” behavior.
2. Have patience
After working with JT Tran and his Confidence Training Course, I’ve learned several things about the male perspective on dating. I have to say - there is a LOT of pressure on guys which i never realized before! They have to muster the courage to ask a girl out, hope they don’t get rejected, determine a date, keep her entertained for some hours and hope things go on to another date plus a potential relationship.
In the event you don’t have a lot of experience regarding how to meet members of the opposite sex, to the point where you’re immune to rejection, it could be nerve-wracking. If you have been giving obvious, subtle hints without much response, don’t assume that he doesn’t like you - these things can take some time.
Before I learned the way to meet and date Asian men alone, I once had to drop hints for four months before one guy realized my feelings and inquired about out! I was definitely more patient than most ladies, but it can pay off over time.
One thing that I discovered that has worked for me is putting myself as part of his proximity over an extended period of time. Another guy I used to be interested in was a waiter with a Korean restaurant. I was attracted to him, but he was usually pretty quiet and kept to himself. I kept visiting the restaurant - maybe once per week or so - and that we gradually started starting to warm up to each other. Eventually, it have got to the point where he would pull up a chair next to me and talk to me as I ate.
Finally, he asked for my number! Success!
3. Remember
Okay, so you’ve given him every one of the hints in the world and he’s finally asked you out. Your date with him, however, wasn’t everything you were expecting - he’s not making the moves you want him to, even though you’re still being ridiculously obvious. What now?
Sometimes, a man is getting the signals and also understands that they are cues for him to behave - anything - but has zero idea what to do with a lovely girl. If you are in this situation, don’t get discouraged. You need to simply realize that he may not fully comprehend what is happening, especially if he isn’t utilized to dating outside his race or culture, a lot less a cute girl.
This isn’t all guys, of course, but there are the occasional few that don’t believe what’s happening: which you, a gorgeous woman, are out on a date with him. There are others that doubt your hints - they don’t believe that a cute girl could possibly be giving them cues and don't recognize the correct response.
From my experience, it’s best to be blunt but perceptive. Some guys take some more reassurance than the others, but that doesn’t imply that they aren’t giving you any resposes in any way.
I was on a date once in which the conversation was so frustratingly awkward that I couldn’t wait for it to finish. I was totally sure that he felt much the same way, but I kept the conversation going each time it trailed off. As we left the restaurant, however, he picked me up off the ground and twirled me around his car, exclaiming how happy he was to be out with me and how much he liked talking to me!
I remarked that he was interested in me, and he later confessed he was nervous about creating eye contact for so long. He actually really enjoyed our date, something which really surprised me!
In the long run, I just needed to be conscious of his feelings rather than project mine to the entire date.
4. Be Sensitive
Remember earlier after i said that not all Asian guys are alike? I really do mean it.
Its not all Asian guy is going to be enthralled with KPop (people are not from my experience) or watch hours of anime at a stretch (slightly more common than KPop lovers, but nonetheless not a majority from our experience) just because those activities are Asian. Therefore, it isn’t in your best interest to come off as a rabid fangirl to him, cooing over pictures of Rain or fawning over Ichigo from Bleach.
Although some guys may that way sort of thing (try your neighborhood anime-con if you’re into that), that’s not first thing you want to talk about with every Asian person you meet, aside from an Asian guy you’re attracted to. Quite frankly, if a woman produces those kinds of signals, you’re planning to scare him off to someone who just uses Asian men.
In the event that sounds strange to you personally, let me put it in perspective: could you walk up to a Black guy and talk about how funny Chris Rock and Dave Chapelle are after a fist bump? Can you then proceed to talk about how horrible slavery was and then apologize for you ancestors?
While it’s this is not on the same level, you don’t want your first sentence to a Asian guy to become about something so stereotypically Asian. It may remind them that you see is “just an Asian” before you decide to and not, in fact, anyone that they are, since their personality is not contained merely inside their race. Depending on who they may be, it may be a turn-off.
With this one, just keep it simple. Talk about your weird English professor, ask his opinion on the best place to get pizza around town, or find out what he is doing in his free time. You can mention that you’ve dated Asian guys before (as covered in obvious hints), but save that tidbit for some minutes in.
I’ve personally found out that if you talk about a guy’s “Asianness” too quickly, the conversation will go south very quickly. I'm able to empathize - who likes feeling objectified? In the end, just make sure that you’re both fairly confident with each other before mentioning potentially touchy subjects.
There isn't any big secret on dating Asian guys. Everyone is going to be different - just like guys in general.
Date Asian Men
I will be confident, however, in my opinion and am certain that this could work for you. If you have any information on what has worked for (or on) you, I might love to hear it, so please will bark in the comments section! Many thanks for reading!